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Business and Marriage

Guess How Many Years in Business?
6 Lessons Learned

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Guess How Many Years in Business?
6 Lessons Learned

August is a big milestone month over here at SimplyAlign – I’m celebrating my business anniversary! Can I get a virtual high five?

Two decades is how long I’ve been online, and that’s a lot! I started in 2003, with my “Living in the Flow” Newsletter, Tai Chi Flow videos, and energy sessions. And I recently stumbled upon an archive of my old newsletter/emails from 2010 going forward– talk about a blast from the past!

Wow, I was busy through those years. Guest spots on summits, podcasts, radio shows, speaking on stages big and small, teaching across the US and in Australia (7 times), hey I forgot that I even wrote a chapter in two best selling books – it’s been quite the ride and I’m still enjoying it…oh so much! And I’m excited about what’s coming up this fall -stay tuned more details coming in the next month.

In the meantime, I’ve been thinking of all the lessons I’ve learned along this 20-year entrepreneurial journey. I’d love to share a few of those nuggets with you because they relate to ALL areas of life, not just business. So here we go:

1. Use the 80/20 rule. Also known as the Pareto Principle: roughly 80% of outcomes come from 20% of effort. For example, 20% of a plant contains 80% of the fruit, 20% of a company’s customers bring in 80% of the profit, and I’d venture to guess – you wear 20% of the clothes in your closet 80% of the time. You get the point. I had to learn NOT to use 80% of my time for a 20% result. To instead, prioritize my highest impact tasks (20%) for the optimal, and easiest results (80%).

2. Honor the Struggle / Embrace the Suck. Running a business is fun…except when it’s not. There are parts of business that I don’t love: admin tasks, learning new technology, communication misunderstandings. But that’s like everything in life, you’ve got to take the unpleasant with the pleasant because those good parts are so worth it. I delegate what I can, and have learned to appreciate the unavoidable parts. I choose to see them as opportunities to rise and be bolder.

3. Time Blocking is my to-do list’s best friend. I started time-blocking to keep myself on task. It’s my daily to-do list put in certain blocks of time, so I never have to waste time mulling over what I should work on next, and getting distracted in the process. I prioritize that beforehand. It also helps me to totally focus on the task at hand during that block, even if another idea pops in my brain (which happens a lot). I just write myself a short note to remember it and keep on the task at hand.

4. You can’t grow what you don’t know. You can’t make a plant grow if you don’t know its soil, right? Same goes for business and life. You’ve gotta pay attention to those numbers, like that wise Peter Drucker said, ‘You can’t manage what you don’t measure.’ But here’s the kicker—once upon a time, I was hesitant about diving into my income figures. It felt like checking the scale every day when you’re trying to be healthy, ya know? Too much and it’s like getting overly focused on numbers. But fast forward to now, and I’m all about those digits. It’s one way of giving my business the respect it deserves.

5. Outdoors + Movement = Clarity. I love working and it seems there is always something to be done. That’s not a good combo…it means since there is always work to do and I like working…well, I’ve learned to get myself away from my office. Outside in nature is a great place to be – it “sharpens the saw” and can be pure gold for creativity. Some of my best ideas have come to me because of sneaking away from work to enjoy nature on a walk or high-speed bike ride.

6. Do Less Better. When overwhelmed, PRUNE. When I get too much on my plate for too long, I’ve learned the answer is to take a look at what’s feeling overwhelming and ask myself the 3-Ds: “What can I delegate, delay, or delete?” I find most tasks fit into one of those buckets. Pruning back the non-essentials makes it possible to do the essentials – to do less – better. It frees up more creative power for the most important things. Keeping it simple is always a good thing in my book!

Those are just a few of the lessons I’ve learned on this journey. I’ll probably share more in the future, but this is long enough for now.

Oh, and guess what?

August isn’t just about SimplyAlign’s birthday bash – it’s also my wedding anniversary month! Yup, Dean-the-dream and I are marking 42 years together! Holy cow, that’s a long time! Maybe next week I’ll have a list of what I’ve learned from marriage, but probably not because even 42 years does not an expert make, haha!

Business and Marriage

But have you ever noticed how business and marriage share a bunch of similarities? They both involve navigating tough times and celebrating victories. Both demand care, patience, teamwork, and a good sense of humor.

Just wanted to say thanks for being part of my journey. Your support means a lot!

Much Love,

Carolyn Cooper

PS – If you missed last week’s email and the downloadable PDF of “Time Affirmations,” it’s waiting for you below:

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Top Ten Things to Say to Yourself

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Top Ten Things to Say to YourselfOften the things we say to ourselves we wouldn’t even think of saying to another person. We blame, shame, call names of the meanest sort, nag, belittle and bully ourselves through self-talk.

What if, instead, we were more gentle with ourselves, asked ourselves questions and listened to the responses. What if we treated ourselves as we treat a best friend, someone we love dearly. Here’s a Top Ten list of loving things to say to yourself.

1. What do you feel? Asking ourselves what we feel can help put names to, and identify emotions. Listening for the response and being honest with ourselves is like taking our emotional temperature.

2. What do you need? A need is different from a want. Whereas a want states a desire, a need is usually a statement about nurturing. Pay attention to your needs, they’re about caring for yourself.

3. Good job Congratulate yourself on a job well done whether it’s mowing the lawn, writing a poem or cleaning the bathroom. Give yourself a verbal pat on the back.

4. I apologize Saying “I’m sorry” for all the wrongs we have done ourselves can be the first step in healing.

5. Let’s play Lighten up and be playful. Listen to what comes up when you suggest play.

6. Breathe Reminding ourselves to breathe helps relieve tension, gives us that moment we sometimes need to center and ground ourselves.

7. I forgive you Sometimes it’s easier to forgive others than to forgive ourselves. Yet, to have closure and to move on, often means we have to forgive ourselves.

8. Let go Releasing worries, resentments, anger, fears loosens the grip of resistance and makes room for growth.

9. Be present Staying present, being aware of the physical, acknowledging the moment, this is when we are truly alive. (In case you missed it, I shared with you the top 10 ways to stay present.)

10. I love you We say it to others, why not say it to ourselves. Say it again.

Have you noticed a difference in the way you talk to yourself? Have you made any changes? What have you see happen when you started talking positively to yourself? Share your thoughts with us  below!

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

Holiday Blitz or Holiday Bliss?

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Holiday Blitz or Holiday Bliss Top Ten Tricks to Stay PresentTop 10 Ways to stay Present.

With the holidays upon us, life can get busier than usual and it’s easy to get overwhelmed, if we don’t stay present in the moment.

Paying attention and keeping the intention to fully ENJOY this week before Christmas makes all the difference between Holiday Blitz and Holiday Bliss.

Try these ten ways to enhance your enjoyment during the holidays.

1. Be present in the moment. Pay attention to the details: Notice the sound of children’s laughter, the meaning of the words in the Christmas carols, the texture and flavor of the food you eat, literally stop to smell the roses (or the gingerbread in this season).

2. Make a list of what you want to accomplish today. List only the portion of a major project that can be completed today. Include pleasures as well as tasks.

3. Concentrate on the task at hand. Give it your best, most often complete is better than “perfect”.

4. Journal first thing every morning to empty your mind of worry and chatter. Write three pages without stopping; it doesn’t need to be grammatically perfect, just let your thoughts flow.

5. Allow thoughts and feelings come and go without judging them. Neither cling to nor reject them. Just breathe.

6. If you feel yourself getting irritated in traffic, or long shopping lines, or with family members, remember you have the power to change your thoughts and responses in each moment. Find three good things about the situation.

7. Don’t try to juggle everything in your mind. During the day when you think of something you don’t want to forget, jot it down, or put it in a note in your smart phone.

8. Be where you are. When you find yourself drifting off elsewhere, a gentle reminder to “be present” can help.

9. Take a moment to transition yourself from place to place and task to task.

10. This time of year reminds us to let go of the past. Make amends, forgive, grieve. Ask for help if you’re unable to let go.

Do you have other ideas that have allowed you to BE more present in your life each day? Share it with us below!

Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications

Are You Too Cautious?

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Are you too cautiousHelen Keller, blind and deaf educator, said: “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” Sometimes it’s wise to be cautious, particularly when physical safety is at stake. However, when we play it safe simply to protect our ego or heart, we may close off possibilities that could bring us greater joy and fulfillment. Life is what we make of it, shaped by our choices. What are you choosing? Answer “true” or “false” to the following statements to discover if you are too cautious.

Set 1

  1. Life doesn’t feel safe. I’m content with things as they are and prefer to stay in my “comfort zone.”
  2. I’m afraid something bad will happen if I veer off my usual course. I feel safer and more confident when I stick to what I already know.
  3. I frequently worry “what if…?” If I can’t be certain of the outcome, I won’t take the risk. Being rejected, looking stupid and failing are not options.
  4. I know there are business and romantic opportunities I’ve missed out on because of being so risk-averse.
  5. My fear of the unknown is paralyzing. When I look at my life, I have many regrets about things I didn’t do.
  6. I feel bad about myself for being so cautious. I think of myself as a coward and I expect that others see me that way, too.

Set 2

  1. I am committed to growing myself bigger than my fears. It’s not that I’m unafraid; it’s just that I am more committed to my goals and know the cost of playing it safe.
  2. Developing courage is like building a muscle. The more I practice taking risks, even small ones, the more empowered I feel.
  3. ­­­­When I have a goal or dream that feels big and scary, I minimize feeling overwhelmed by “chunking it down” into more manageable, short-term steps.
  4. I enlist the support of those who can help me move beyond my comfort zone to a more fulfilling life.
  5. When I take risks, I trust I can handle whatever comes. If I fall, I know that I can get up again. I don’t conclude that I shouldn’t have tried or that I’m a failure.
  6. My biggest successes have come when I’ve taken a big leap of faith.

 

If you answered True more often in Set 1 and False more often in Set 2,  it sounds like you are ready to move beyond your comfort zone to live a more fulfilled life. A great place to start is with my “Fear Busting” group call coming up in Dec. It will help eliminate the underlying reasons why you hold yourself back in many situations, so you can step into your courageous self and create a life that rocks!

Go here for more info and to register.

Top 10 Self-Help Mobile Apps

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Top 10 Self Help Mobile AppsI thought we would try something fun this month. I don’t know about you, but I do keep my smartphone with me most of the time. The freedom of being able to keep up with my business while out of my office is so….well….freeeing! Why not make even better use of them!

Use of technology to enhance well-being is on the upswing. Here are some fun apps that you can use on a regular basis to help you take a healthy, refreshing break from the day-to-day.

1. Gratitude Journal Forgetting gratitude? You know that I am always recommending journal time. What an easy way to keep up with it wherever you are! This app offers daily reminders and iCloud syncing. Add photos, share what you’re grateful for.

2. The Habit Factor Yes, an app for breaking annoying habits. Set goals, create new positive behaviors, track your success.

3. iZen Garden 2 A virtual zen garden in your palm­—the tranquility that comes from being in a real one, without the messy sand!

4. myinstantCOACH Advice for big decisions in relationships, finance, career or well-being. Offers specific options and actions you can take.

5. Serenity One of the best relaxation tools. Especially lovely on an iPad. Listen, watch and reee-laaax!

6. Authentic Yoga Easy-to-follow app by Deepak Chopra. Choose your music, and follow the graceful yoga master Tara Stiles.

7. Niroga Manage Your Stress Manage stress with four simple techniques you can use anywhere.

8. Feel Good Tracker Track positive feeling with easy-to-use logs and iCal system; take photos and even tweet or email your entries.

9 . Sleep Machine – Binaural Beats Induce relaxation, creativity and other desirable states. Add to ambient music and produce a lifelike sound environment.

10. Mappiness An iPhone app that discerns how your environment influences your mood. Chart when, where and with whom you’re happiest.

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

Curiosity and Results – What’s the Connection?

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Curiosity and Results - What's the Connection?Curiosity has been given a bad rap. Perhaps we grew up hearing that asking questions was rude or conveyed ignorance, or that we’d get into trouble if we were like Curious George. We might even have been warned that “Curiosity killed the cat!”

The truth is that curiosity is one of the most vital and life-affirming qualities you can bring to your life and your relationships.

Curiosity in Business

It is so easy to blame others when things go wrong. Consider being curious about your experience rather than critical. For example, instead of beating yourself up for not reaching sales goals—again—try asking yourself what was going on for you that you kept performing below your expectations? With an attitude of “how fascinating that I’ve created this” you are much more likely to help yourself find new solutions to attaining your goals.

Curiosity in Life

Helen Keller said, “Life is a daring adventure or nothing at all!” When you cultivate an attitude of curiosity, doors open and adventures begin; questions lead to new possibilities. For example, asking yourself, “What do I want to learn now and where might that lead me?” can set you on a journey of exciting exploration that moves you forward. If, instead, you come from the place of “I already know what I need to know,” you shut off the possibility of discovering something new that could rock your world.

Curiosity in Relationships

How often we assume we know what someone else is thinking or experiencing. What if we came from a place of not knowing and offered others an invitation to speak? According to Sharon Ellison, creator of Powerful Non-Defensive Communication, “A non-defensive question is innocently curious, reflecting the purity of the child who asks how a flower grows or what makes an airplane fly.” We invite others to share their true experience when we ask questions without hidden agendas and to clarify understanding.

Practice Cultivating Curiosity

Here are some ways to cultivate a more curious life:

Go outside. No matter the weather, the world is full of fascinating things waiting to be discovered. Go for a walk (especially barefoot in the grass!) or a bike ride. Bring someone with you and make discovery a game.

Ask questions. Did you hear something interesting on the radio that you’ve never heard before? Google it! See what else there is to know. Practice asking questions with openness and neutrality. Practice with strangers in stores and with people close to you. Stop thinking you know all the answers…be open to being surprised! An inquiry is an open-ended question designed to broaden your perspective. For example: “What would make life a daring adventure for me?” “Where in my life do I assume I already know?”

Look or listen closely. Rather than rush through your day take a moment to stop and “smell the roses.” What colors do you see? What expressions are people wearing? What sounds make up your environment? Can you identify them?

Challenge your assumptions. These impact how we treat strangers as well as loved ones. Start by asking, “What if that’s not true?” What other choices might you make then?

Play I Spy. Take on a new skill or learn something new from a friend. Be Curious!

If you truly want to expand your excitement, joy and fulfillment in life and relationship, sprinkle liberal doses of curiosity and watch your life become the fabulous adventure it can be!

Share with us how you have cultivated curiosity in your life! Join the conversation below…

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

Ten Ways to Simplify Your Life

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Ten Ways to SImplify your lifeThese days a chorus of thousands has taken up Henry David Thoreau’s advice to “Simplify, simplify.” And for good reason. Few among us would deny our lives are too complicated and filled with too much stress.

Simplicity is about eliminating clutter – from your mind, your home, your relationships and your lifestyle. Following are ten ways to begin.

1. Get a clear idea of what you want your life to look like. This picture will help you discover what you must eliminate.

2. Let go of projects, roles or self-imposed obligations that take up time and keep you away from what you really want.

3. Say ‘No’ to what you don’t want in your life. Say Yes to what you do want.

4. Schedule “break” days for yourself where you don’t do anything but what you really want. Don’t cancel them.

5. Make a “to do” day and get all those chores and errands done in a single day.

6. Create space. File away or toss out; give away, sell or trade.

7. Make and return phone calls only during certain hours.

8. Shop only when you have to. Question your purchases. Consuming less is good for the planet, too.

9. Ask for and accept help. Delegate chores. Hire work done when possible.

10. Remember to breathe, to ground yourself and be physically present.

Simplifying means making choices that will improve the quality of your life.

*Bonus* A gratitude list will help you discover what really matters to you. Let’s start a list together! Join the conversation down below in the comments section! I’m looking forward to seeing what you are grateful for!

 

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

Top 10 Ideas for Journaling

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Top 10 Ideas for JournalingIt has been said that journaling is a voyage to the interior. Inside of all of us is a unique wisdom that can inform our choices and enhance our experience of life. Once we tap into that, we realize that we know more than we thought we did. One potent way to access this wisdom is through journaling. I love the answers I find when I relax, put pen to paper, and just begin writing. Sometimes I write about weird or silly thoughts until something better and more constructive comes out. But the trick is to sit down and begin.

Here are 10 ideas to help you mine for gold with a pen:

1. Free write. Write as fast as you can—whatever comes to your mind—without regard to spelling, punctuation, etc. This “brain dump” helps you clear your mind and prepare for the day.

2. Write about your childhood. Write specific memories and notice any trends that occur or insights you have about your present life.

3. Free associate. One word sparks another and so on. Watching where your mind takes you can help you get “underneath” issues you may be dealing with.

4. Create timelines, graphs or word clusters (aka “mindmaps”). Use these tools to explore trends, patterns and different perspectives.

5. Write letters. Clear up issues or unfinished business. Even if you never end up sending it, writing can clear up stuck energy.

6. Draw or collage. You know the saying, “A picture is worth a thousand words.”

7. Keep an idea journal. Jot down ideas that come to you throughout the day.

8. Make lists. Fears, things you’re grateful for, aspirations, animals in your dreams, etc. Making lists aggregates information in ways that give you a big picture view.

9. Ask and answer questions. Pretend someone is interviewing you about an issue and answer their question. You may be surprised by what comes out of your mouth or pen.

10. Record your dreams. What do the images and feelings in them tell you?

Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications

How to Create A Balanced Relationship

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How to Create A Balanced RelationshipWhether they are married, in a relationship or single – most people would say they want to have a balanced relationship with their significant other.  But what does a balanced relationship look like and how do you maintain it?

The fact is, we all relate to people in different ways: Dependently (or codependently), Independently and Interdependently.

Dependent/codependent:
In these relationships one person sets aside his or her personal welfare to maintain the relationship. This dynamic implies that the codependent person in the relationship can’t survive independently of the other person.

Independent:
In this configuration, the couple lives mostly separate lives. For example, they have different friends, are rarely together and make decisions autonomously. They may live separately as well and they are fine with that arrangement.

Interdependent:
In this type of relationship, two people are intimate with one another but don’t compromise or sacrifice themselves or their values. This dynamic is about collaboration and cooperation. Each person is self-reliant (physically, emotionally, financially, etc.) and, simultaneously, responsible to the other.

While it’s possible to find happiness, at least temporarily, in all three types of relationships, the Interdependent relationship is generally considered the model for a balanced relationship.

What do you do if you don’t consider your relationship to be balanced? With a little information and effort it’s possible to attain a balanced relationship.

1. Find Inner Balance by:
• Focusing on what you can control (your thoughts, feelings and actions) not what you can’t (others’ thoughts, feelings and actions).
• Noticing how you feel and, as clearly and calmly as you can, communicating those feelings.
• Recognizing and owning your issues, which will help you recognize your partner’s as well. You can be empathic and supportive without having to “fix” everything.

2. Create and Maintain a Balanced Relationship by:
• Staying present and empathic even when your partner is upset.
• Stepping back from conflicts to avoid escalation, assess the problem and make positive changes.
• Reframing the actions/reactions of your partner. For example, seeing a loved one as anxious and fearful, instead of cruel and controlling, paves the way for a more sympathetic, less confrontational approach.
• Being a good listener and focusing on the only person you can change—yourself.

3. Recognize and change old emotional patterns and blocked energetic pathways by:
• Writing down negative feelings that manifest themselves throughout your day. Then rewrite them in a positive light.
• Become aware of “triggers” that influence your mood. Many times just the awareness will lead to your ability to not be influenced by them – putting you in control.
• Write down up to 10 positive affirmations you would like to see manifested in your relationship and post them where you will see and read them often (ie. Bathroom mirror, near your computer screen, etc.)

Keep in mind that balance, like a relationship, is dynamic not static. It’s impossible to keep balance 100% of the time in every situation. Even a balanced relationship can, at times, feel like more work than play.

Remember, sometimes the focus will be more on you, other times more on your partner, and still other times when what’s best for “us” needs the focus rather than either individual.

Like a wave, there is an ebb and flow to relationships. But once we are aware of what balanced relationships look like we can better manage that dynamic.

Would you like to pull out those threads of negative emotional patterns and release blocked energy to allow your Spirit to be more open to and/or attract the relationship you desire?

This month I am having a group phone session focusing on Romantic Relationships. For those of you in a relationship this call will be focused on your relationship with your partner. If you are single we will also be releasing issues blocking you from attracting your ideal mate. So really, this call is for everyone!

Here’s what we’ll be working on:
• Releasing negative dependent/co-dependent/independent false beliefs.
• Shifting thought patterns to accept and attract an interdependent relationship.
• Instilling positive affirmations to support your raised energetic attractiveness for the relationship you desire.

To learn more about group phone sessions and to sign-up, go here.

Author’s content used under license, © 2011 Claire Communications

Thoughts Under the Stars

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Thoughts Under the StarsLast week I had the opportunity to be out in nature, sleeping under the stars. Now, I’m not a big fan of camping (the dirt, the cold nights, the out-house, lying on hard, bumpy ground, etc.), however, I do love sleeping under the stars and admiring their brilliance, majesty, and beauty. There were SO many stars in the sky last week! And I even saw several shooting stars, which always puts a big smile on my face even if I’m the only one still awake to see them.

Something about sleeping under all those stars in God’s great big sky that really brings life into perspective for me. I always think of the millions of others around the globe who are looking up at the same stars as I am, as well as people throughout history who have lived, camped, traveled, warred, and loved under this same beautiful canopy of stars -cue the song, “Somewhere Out There” from the kid’s movie “An American Tail” (yes, that’s the way they spell ‘tale’).

Somehow realizing how small I am in this huge galaxy inspires me to live bigger, live better. Here in the US it is summer, and I recognize I have many readers from other countries, where it may be a different season for you right now, but no matter the weather, have you taken the opportunity recently to really look up and connect to this beautiful Universe? I don’t do that often enough, but when I take the time to be still, look up and just listen for the inspiration that is waiting to talk to me I sense and feel juicy nuggets of knowledge that help me on my journey through life.

How about you? When was the last time you relaxed under a beautiful star-filled sky? How did that inspire you? When can you arrange to do that again? Ask yourself these questions, and/or feel free to add your comments to the blog by clicking below.

Now I am on my way to find my air mattress in my storage closet so I can set it up on my deck tonight, gaze up at the stars once again~ I am open to receiving all the inspiration I can get!