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Top Ten Things to Say to Yourself

Top Ten Things to Say to YourselfOften the things we say to ourselves we wouldn’t even think of saying to another person. We blame, shame, call names of the meanest sort, nag, belittle and bully ourselves through self-talk.

What if, instead, we were more gentle with ourselves, asked ourselves questions and listened to the responses. What if we treated ourselves as we treat a best friend, someone we love dearly. Here’s a Top Ten list of loving things to say to yourself.

1. What do you feel? Asking ourselves what we feel can help put names to, and identify emotions. Listening for the response and being honest with ourselves is like taking our emotional temperature.

2. What do you need? A need is different from a want. Whereas a want states a desire, a need is usually a statement about nurturing. Pay attention to your needs, they’re about caring for yourself.

3. Good job Congratulate yourself on a job well done whether it’s mowing the lawn, writing a poem or cleaning the bathroom. Give yourself a verbal pat on the back.

4. I apologize Saying “I’m sorry” for all the wrongs we have done ourselves can be the first step in healing.

5. Let’s play Lighten up and be playful. Listen to what comes up when you suggest play.

6. Breathe Reminding ourselves to breathe helps relieve tension, gives us that moment we sometimes need to center and ground ourselves.

7. I forgive you Sometimes it’s easier to forgive others than to forgive ourselves. Yet, to have closure and to move on, often means we have to forgive ourselves.

8. Let go Releasing worries, resentments, anger, fears loosens the grip of resistance and makes room for growth.

9. Be present Staying present, being aware of the physical, acknowledging the moment, this is when we are truly alive. (In case you missed it, I shared with you the top 10 ways to stay present.)

10. I love you We say it to others, why not say it to ourselves. Say it again.

Have you noticed a difference in the way you talk to yourself? Have you made any changes? What have you see happen when you started talking positively to yourself? Share your thoughts with us  below!

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

Holiday Blitz or Holiday Bliss?

Holiday Blitz or Holiday Bliss Top Ten Tricks to Stay PresentTop 10 Ways to stay Present.

With the holidays upon us, life can get busier than usual and it’s easy to get overwhelmed, if we don’t stay present in the moment.

Paying attention and keeping the intention to fully ENJOY this week before Christmas makes all the difference between Holiday Blitz and Holiday Bliss.

Try these ten ways to enhance your enjoyment during the holidays.

1. Be present in the moment. Pay attention to the details: Notice the sound of children’s laughter, the meaning of the words in the Christmas carols, the texture and flavor of the food you eat, literally stop to smell the roses (or the gingerbread in this season).

2. Make a list of what you want to accomplish today. List only the portion of a major project that can be completed today. Include pleasures as well as tasks.

3. Concentrate on the task at hand. Give it your best, most often complete is better than “perfect”.

4. Journal first thing every morning to empty your mind of worry and chatter. Write three pages without stopping; it doesn’t need to be grammatically perfect, just let your thoughts flow.

5. Allow thoughts and feelings come and go without judging them. Neither cling to nor reject them. Just breathe.

6. If you feel yourself getting irritated in traffic, or long shopping lines, or with family members, remember you have the power to change your thoughts and responses in each moment. Find three good things about the situation.

7. Don’t try to juggle everything in your mind. During the day when you think of something you don’t want to forget, jot it down, or put it in a note in your smart phone.

8. Be where you are. When you find yourself drifting off elsewhere, a gentle reminder to “be present” can help.

9. Take a moment to transition yourself from place to place and task to task.

10. This time of year reminds us to let go of the past. Make amends, forgive, grieve. Ask for help if you’re unable to let go.

Do you have other ideas that have allowed you to BE more present in your life each day? Share it with us below!

Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications

Ten Ways to Simplify Your Life

Ten Ways to SImplify your lifeThese days a chorus of thousands has taken up Henry David Thoreau’s advice to “Simplify, simplify.” And for good reason. Few among us would deny our lives are too complicated and filled with too much stress.

Simplicity is about eliminating clutter – from your mind, your home, your relationships and your lifestyle. Following are ten ways to begin.

1. Get a clear idea of what you want your life to look like. This picture will help you discover what you must eliminate.

2. Let go of projects, roles or self-imposed obligations that take up time and keep you away from what you really want.

3. Say ‘No’ to what you don’t want in your life. Say Yes to what you do want.

4. Schedule “break” days for yourself where you don’t do anything but what you really want. Don’t cancel them.

5. Make a “to do” day and get all those chores and errands done in a single day.

6. Create space. File away or toss out; give away, sell or trade.

7. Make and return phone calls only during certain hours.

8. Shop only when you have to. Question your purchases. Consuming less is good for the planet, too.

9. Ask for and accept help. Delegate chores. Hire work done when possible.

10. Remember to breathe, to ground yourself and be physically present.

Simplifying means making choices that will improve the quality of your life.

*Bonus* A gratitude list will help you discover what really matters to you. Let’s start a list together! Join the conversation down below in the comments section! I’m looking forward to seeing what you are grateful for!

 

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

How Well Do You Stay in the Present?

How Well Do You Stay in the Present?The way to live a full and rich life, to deepen our connections with others and to experience true intimacy is by staying in the present moment. Yet much of what we do and how we live takes us out of the present and ricochets us into some unknown future or drags us back into the mire of the past. Other times, we simply “space out,” disconnect from where we are, who we’re with, and what we’re doing.

The great spiritual teacher Thich Nhat Hanh said mindfulness is to be present in the present moment. Take the following quiz to discover how much, and in what ways you detach from the present moment.

T/F 1. I have a tendency to live in the future, projecting into tomorrow, or next week or even years from now.

T/F 2. I spend much of my time thinking about the past, replaying conversations or reliving incidents or events, or I play “what if” in my mind.

T/F 3. Sometimes when I’m in conversation with someone, I can’t remember what was just said.

T/F 4. When eating a meal, my family often watches TV or videos or reads.

T/F 5. In talking with someone, I think of how I’m going to respond rather than listening to what the other person is saying.

T/F 6. I tend to worry.

T/F 7. I try to figure out how things will work out or what someone else will do.

T/F 8. I allow the telephone or pager to interrupt whatever I’m doing.

T/F 9. I often/frequently hope for something better or different.

T/F 10. I often/frequently dread something worse will happen.

T/F 11. I find myself always busy, with never an empty or spare moment.

T/F 12. When I am feeling uncomfortable in a situation, I change the subject or get up and move around, or get something to eat/drink/smoke/do.

T/F 13. In some situations, I find myself getting sleepy or yawning when I’m not really tired.

T/F 14. I find it difficult to maintain eye contact when I’m talking with someone.

T/F 15. Sometimes I can’t remember what I just read or I don’t know what just took place in the movie or video I’m watching.

T/F 16. When I’m with certain people, we talk about others (gossiping, discussing shortcomings or talking about their problems).

T/F 17. I take my cell phone everywhere and it’s always on.

T/F 18. My conversations with others tend to be about superficial subjects.

T/F 19. Rather than staying with my emotions and naming them (“I am feeling…”), I attempt to alter the feelings.

T/F 20. In my family or with my partner, we watch TV programs that we don’t really care about rather than interact with each other.

Many of us may feel a push-pull when it comes to intimacy. We want to be closer to others, but the vulnerability that it demands is too frightening. Or we may feel restless or distracted or just plain uncomfortable when we attempt to stay in the present.

If this quiz brought up some things for you that you’d love to do some energy work on to release negative triggers, please visit my Certified SimplyHealed™ Practitioner page. These wonderful Certified SimplyHealed™ Practitioners can help you feel more peace, joy and balance in your life!

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

Energy Work Can Improve Relationships

In this video, Jolene Victor of Victory Energy Wellness joins me to talk about her experience as a SimplyHealed PractitionerTM and how it has improved her relationships with her family members.

Find out more about taking the SimplyHealed training here.

Energy Work Can Be Simple

In this video, Jenny Hobby of Australia shares her experience as a certified SimplyHealed™ Practitioner and the simplicity of this energy healing method.

Find out more about taking the SimplyHealed training here.

How to Create A Balanced Relationship

How to Create A Balanced RelationshipWhether they are married, in a relationship or single – most people would say they want to have a balanced relationship with their significant other.  But what does a balanced relationship look like and how do you maintain it?

The fact is, we all relate to people in different ways: Dependently (or codependently), Independently and Interdependently.

Dependent/codependent:
In these relationships one person sets aside his or her personal welfare to maintain the relationship. This dynamic implies that the codependent person in the relationship can’t survive independently of the other person.

Independent:
In this configuration, the couple lives mostly separate lives. For example, they have different friends, are rarely together and make decisions autonomously. They may live separately as well and they are fine with that arrangement.

Interdependent:
In this type of relationship, two people are intimate with one another but don’t compromise or sacrifice themselves or their values. This dynamic is about collaboration and cooperation. Each person is self-reliant (physically, emotionally, financially, etc.) and, simultaneously, responsible to the other.

While it’s possible to find happiness, at least temporarily, in all three types of relationships, the Interdependent relationship is generally considered the model for a balanced relationship.

What do you do if you don’t consider your relationship to be balanced? With a little information and effort it’s possible to attain a balanced relationship.

1. Find Inner Balance by:
• Focusing on what you can control (your thoughts, feelings and actions) not what you can’t (others’ thoughts, feelings and actions).
• Noticing how you feel and, as clearly and calmly as you can, communicating those feelings.
• Recognizing and owning your issues, which will help you recognize your partner’s as well. You can be empathic and supportive without having to “fix” everything.

2. Create and Maintain a Balanced Relationship by:
• Staying present and empathic even when your partner is upset.
• Stepping back from conflicts to avoid escalation, assess the problem and make positive changes.
• Reframing the actions/reactions of your partner. For example, seeing a loved one as anxious and fearful, instead of cruel and controlling, paves the way for a more sympathetic, less confrontational approach.
• Being a good listener and focusing on the only person you can change—yourself.

3. Recognize and change old emotional patterns and blocked energetic pathways by:
• Writing down negative feelings that manifest themselves throughout your day. Then rewrite them in a positive light.
• Become aware of “triggers” that influence your mood. Many times just the awareness will lead to your ability to not be influenced by them – putting you in control.
• Write down up to 10 positive affirmations you would like to see manifested in your relationship and post them where you will see and read them often (ie. Bathroom mirror, near your computer screen, etc.)

Keep in mind that balance, like a relationship, is dynamic not static. It’s impossible to keep balance 100% of the time in every situation. Even a balanced relationship can, at times, feel like more work than play.

Remember, sometimes the focus will be more on you, other times more on your partner, and still other times when what’s best for “us” needs the focus rather than either individual.

Like a wave, there is an ebb and flow to relationships. But once we are aware of what balanced relationships look like we can better manage that dynamic.

Would you like to pull out those threads of negative emotional patterns and release blocked energy to allow your Spirit to be more open to and/or attract the relationship you desire?

This month I am having a group phone session focusing on Romantic Relationships. For those of you in a relationship this call will be focused on your relationship with your partner. If you are single we will also be releasing issues blocking you from attracting your ideal mate. So really, this call is for everyone!

Here’s what we’ll be working on:
• Releasing negative dependent/co-dependent/independent false beliefs.
• Shifting thought patterns to accept and attract an interdependent relationship.
• Instilling positive affirmations to support your raised energetic attractiveness for the relationship you desire.

To learn more about group phone sessions and to sign-up, go here.

Author’s content used under license, © 2011 Claire Communications

Thoughts Under the Stars

Thoughts Under the StarsLast week I had the opportunity to be out in nature, sleeping under the stars. Now, I’m not a big fan of camping (the dirt, the cold nights, the out-house, lying on hard, bumpy ground, etc.), however, I do love sleeping under the stars and admiring their brilliance, majesty, and beauty. There were SO many stars in the sky last week! And I even saw several shooting stars, which always puts a big smile on my face even if I’m the only one still awake to see them.

Something about sleeping under all those stars in God’s great big sky that really brings life into perspective for me. I always think of the millions of others around the globe who are looking up at the same stars as I am, as well as people throughout history who have lived, camped, traveled, warred, and loved under this same beautiful canopy of stars -cue the song, “Somewhere Out There” from the kid’s movie “An American Tail” (yes, that’s the way they spell ‘tale’).

Somehow realizing how small I am in this huge galaxy inspires me to live bigger, live better. Here in the US it is summer, and I recognize I have many readers from other countries, where it may be a different season for you right now, but no matter the weather, have you taken the opportunity recently to really look up and connect to this beautiful Universe? I don’t do that often enough, but when I take the time to be still, look up and just listen for the inspiration that is waiting to talk to me I sense and feel juicy nuggets of knowledge that help me on my journey through life.

How about you? When was the last time you relaxed under a beautiful star-filled sky? How did that inspire you? When can you arrange to do that again? Ask yourself these questions, and/or feel free to add your comments to the blog by clicking below.

Now I am on my way to find my air mattress in my storage closet so I can set it up on my deck tonight, gaze up at the stars once again~ I am open to receiving all the inspiration I can get!

Muscle Testing

Muscle TestingMuscle testing is a great little tool that provides information on energy blockages, the functioning of the organs, nutritional deficiencies, and food sensitivities, among other things. It can also be used to test the body’s responses to herbs, essential oils, and other remedies. It is a non-invasive way of evaluating the body’s imbalances and assessing its needs. The body’s responses will either test strong or weak when applying slight pressure to any muscle.

I’ve taught classes on muscle testing for many years, and have noticed one thing that people really seem to struggle with.

I often get asked, “If you’re testing supplements it will always give you an answer either yes or no, and that will be a ‘Universal truth’”.

But when you’re testing for emotional issues it may test strong for someone on a negative belief they have about themselves but that is not a “Universal truth”, it is just a false-belief they have about themselves. It is just their own truth they have come to believe.”

So why does muscle-testing give the truth on
remedies, and not the ‘real’ truth for
negative misperceptions about ourselves?

Why does it work one way with remedies & supplements,
etc, and in a different way with emotions?

I can understand the confusion about this IF you are assuming that a strong response always means true and that a weak response always means false.

Think of it more in the sense of how does that resonate with what my patterns and beliefs are. Because what we are actually testing is:

Does this resonate with my body?
Does this resonate with my emotions?
Does this resonate with what my belief about this issue is?

Whenever you say or think something that resonates as true with your subconscious mind, the electrical and magnetic fields around your body actually become stronger therefore strengthening the muscle.

Similarly, when you say or think something that resonates as false with your subconscious mind, the electrical and magnetic fields around your body actually become weaker, so the muscle will test weak.

Let’s take this example of a woman who is a good mother, but is struggling in that area right now. If I test this statement on her:

“I am a good mother” and it goes weak, it is not saying that that statement is false and the truth is that she really is not a good mother – that is not a “Universal truth” It is simply showing that she has some doubts about her mothering at that time (or some stored ones) in her subconscious or conscious mind that are weakening the electrical and magnetic fields. The worry and doubt she has about it are what is making it weak.
The fact that it is not a “Universal truth” does not mean that the muscle testing is working in a different way than if we were simply testing for a supplement.
Again, we are seeing how strong or weak the energy is, not if something is true or false.

muscle test coverI hope that clears that up! Feel free to add your comments below and let me know…

If you need more clarity or want to WATCH and learn how muscle testing is done, I recommend my DVD, The Art of Muscle Testing available here. That way you can watch it as many times as you need to, practice, practice, practice and you’ll be a pro muscle tester in no time!

Family Stress Test

Family Stress TestStress is a natural and normal “by-product” of every family’s life. In fact, family stress can bring out the best of us: as we stretch to meet the challenges we face, we become better parents, our children blossom and our families grow. But too much stress can spiral our families in the other direction. Take this Thriving test to see how your family fares.

Set 1

1. There is a lot of bickering in our house. Someone is always angry at someone else.

2. There’s never enough time to sit down together, either to talk or to eat. There’s always too much to do.   3. My spouse and I argue a lot about how to raise the children.

4. It’s like pulling teeth to get the kids to help around the house.

5. Our family has experienced a lot of significant change recently (divorce, death, blending family, job loss, illness, other trauma).

6. Money is very tight. My partner and I have constant conflicts about how to spend it.

7. My child has been having behavioral problems at school.

8. The children get upset when they hear us arguing.

9. I work too much, and it’s really getting to me.

10. We don’t really talk about hard issues; we just try to hold our breath, wait and let them go away.

Set 2

1. We acknowledge feelings, encourage their expression and allow time for dealing with the issues these feelings raise.

2. We plan time for family activities. And we eat together at least once every day.

3. If a blended family, we maintain and nurture original parent-child relationships and let new relationships develop in their own time.

4. I feel confident in my role as parent.

5. Our family easily maintains a sense of humor and playfulness.

6. Family priorities take precedence over work.

7. I know what’s important to my kids.

8. When issues arise that we get stuck on, we ask for help from other family members, support groups, community-based programs, clergy and/or a therapist.

9. We have enough money for the important things.

10. Everyone in the family has responsibilities around the house and does them without being nagged.

If you answered true more often in the first set than in the second set, you may want to seek help lowering the stress level of your family. Families that communicate about problems, who face issues as they arise, who support one another and seek help when it is needed, can build strong bonds among themselves, nurture a healthy and loving family and have a lot more fun doing it!

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Do you have a family that puts the FUN in dysfunction? Do you cringe at the thought of spending a weekend with certain family members?

Or, maybe you have a great family, but there’s been some recent ‘upsets’ that have caused some tension or awkwardness.

And yes, even if you feel like you are the only “normal” one in your family! We are the chain-breaking generation, and it’s time to release those unhealthy patterns.

Join me for our next Group Energy Clearing Session!

Author’s content used  under license, © 2008 Claire Communications